Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t cotton to rapists

Why are the bands Smashmouth and Nickelback often used as punchlines?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What legal actions can be taken if a neighbor's unleashed dog causes harm or injury?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

What are the best examples of reverse psychology?

I have a reading level above third grade

I see through liars

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What is the meaning behind people claiming to hear voices of God in their heads without anyone else hearing them? Is this a sign of mental illness or possession by an evil spirit?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

How do you relax?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t buy bullshit

What ended your relationship with your best friend?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I can read

Has anyone been tricked into having sex with a shemale? How was the experience?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Why do flat-earth conspiracy theorists believe that photos from space, including those of satellites, are fake?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Have you ever seen your wife being fucked?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

‘Gas station heroin’ is technically illegal and widely available. Here are the facts - WANE 15

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Feather-legged lace weaver spider kills prey by covering it with toxic silk - Phys.org

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I can count

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I actually pay taxes

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for fakery

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”